The North American Tiddlywinks Association|
T i d d l y w i n k s !
Newswink 5 was edited by Bill Renke, produced on a typewriter, and printed by mimeograph in two colors (blue and purple).
Like the sound of a thousand tolling bells at dawn, the clatter of
counters in faraway pots swells to a climactic din that heralds the beginning
of another Winking season. A gleaming golden squidger rises slowly in the sky. Sunshine is everywhere.
THE OFFICIAL PUBLICATION OF THE NORTH AMERICAN TIDDLYWINKS ASSOCIATION
|NUMBER 5 / February, 1972||EDITOR: Bill Renke||Price -- 17 rubles|
Jim Marlin, noted MIT winker, recently spent 6 weeks in Europe. Shortly
before his return to "the states" he embarked upon a journey never before
attempted by one so young; never before had one of so little note attempted what many had only dreamed. Jim went in search of the Supreme Dean. Alan
Dean, it is written, is the Secretary of ETwA and the English Singles Champion and the holder of many records and trophies. His squidger is believed to be
made of gold and his fingers precise instruments capable of potting winks and squopping piles at great distances. How had Jim come to meet this great
legend? How indeed had Jim come to have the honor of playing against this man; to share the same mat and pot? (cont.)
Word just in through the grapevine (SD) tells NEWSWINK that Phil Villar, expert winker and man about Hartford, has just been reassigned to Arlington, Tex. Phil is a field service technician for Pratt and Whitney and realised he was to be transferred. Phil's hope was to be assigned somewhere on the east coast so that he would be within winking distance, but apparently the company had other ideas. Rumor has it that Phil will unanimously become the second member of NATwA's Closet of Fame at the continentals. Well, Phil, at least you're in a big league city now!
WELCOME TO ITHACA
Yawn! The 1971 Pairs Tournament was held in Ottawa last May and as expected, Bob Henninge and Ferd T. Bull of Somerville emerged once again as the champions. Playing flawlessly, they continually beat the shit out of everyone they played, accumulating 62 points in 10 games for a whopping 6.2 points per game average; the highest average ever recorded for a match. In second place at 50½ points were Severin Drix and Phil Villar of Blue Mountain with Rosie Wain and Andy Tomaszewski of Ottawa in a close third at 47. After the match, Ferd and Bob were presented with the championship Pear by Moishe and then joined the second and third pairs smiling and drinking homemade Rocinante wine out of tiddlywinks pots, while the cameras clicked and the spectators drifted off. The tournament was by far the most organised and friendly match in the history of NATwA. All the credit goes to Andy Tomaszewski, who was so precise, that the final round of the match pitted the #1 vs. #2, #3 vs. #4 and #5 vs. #6 pairs. CBC was there and Ottawa newspapers and radio stations all carried news of the match.
The atmosphere at the start of this winking season seems somewhat different if only in that no one has voiced any doubts as to whether NATwA would thrive again. But in spite of the optimism, one cannot help but notice that the organisation has not increased in size. A couple of new entries have been added to the books as possible starters for this year, but a couple of old ones may well have disappeared. It seems that the expansion of winkmania in North America has reached a plateau similar to the state of affairs in the British Isles (see SENOPOT) but, inexplicably, at a lower level of participation. We have perhaps one-third the number of established teams in an area with a far greater population than that of the United Kingdom. Perhaps part of the problem is one of communication—both the establishment of communication and its maintenance. The idea has often occurred in conversation of a "Winking Crusade" in which several winkers of high caliber would tour a number of universities in order to promote the game and help to establish teams. Naturally, this was never taken as a serious suggestion due to its infeasability in terms of time and finances, and also because one demonstration could only result in the development of a team in the most exceptional of circumstances. Obviously, a team can only grow with continued exposure to the game of winks in its fully developed form, which implies either the involvement of experienced individuals or the opportunity for the novices to take part in or observe A-level tournaments.
I would like to explain why this issue of NEWSWINK has been so late in
arriving. NEWSWINK usually comes out twice each year, in the spring and fall.
Last Sept. Andy expected to put this out, but due to much other work he continually postponed the publication until eventually, I had to take over the
task, in order to have an issue out by now. It may not be the NEWSWINK you are familiar with. It does not have that special something only Andy can add, but
I hope it at least holds your interest. A lot of material is covered because it has been a long time (10 months) since the last issue, so please excuse the
lack of depth in coverage of certain events.
Andy expresses his regret at having to resign as editor of NEWSWINK. (see letters). Therefore, there is a position open for a new editor. This person,
whomever it may be, will be responsible for the next issue, due to be out sometime in April. I hope there is someone willing to assume the duties of the
editorship. This person must be capable of writing and knowledgeable enough of the game and its players to do the paper justice. If anyone feels they may be
qualified, please contact me as soon as possible.
The next issue of NEWSWINK is going to be reader oriented. I want everyone
who reads this to write me a letter between now and early April. Some of the
things you could write about include:
and anything else that may be on your mind about the game, the people or the
matches. Hopefully, all this material will be gathered by the new editor and
make up a substantial portion of NEWSWINK 6. If not, I shall again do it myself.
Once again, please excuse the lateness of this issue and the numerous typographical errors (my fingers are worn to the bone). I can only say that it
has been an enjoyable task; one that could have been done a lot better if only I had more time and imagination.
23 Atherton Place
Newton, Mass. 02162
The first annual North American Junior Continental Championships have been
tentatively scheduled for the weekend of March 18-19. Right now the greatest
likelihood is for 3 home teams and one visiting team. Blue Mountain has enough
people to easily field two teams, and now there's a team at the high school in
our district, presently composed mostly of 9th graders who played at Blue
Mountain last year. The only visiting team I'm sure of is Sid's team from his
high school in Rye. Sid tells me he has many students and a large part of the
staff at his school playing winks—including most of the gym teachers and
coaches! He employs the subtle approach: he doesn't mention the game or try
to push it, he just plays it a while in some noticeable place and then leaves
it behind (with a rule book) and goes off, while the others start trying it out
of sheer curiosity. It seems to work, but his players are still at an early
stage and probably won't be a match for Blue Mountain's seasoned veterans. I
am really impressed by some of these guys, especially Andy Lee. This guy is
not only a very good player, one who could play respectfully for a contending
team in NATwA, especially with some more match experience, but he is also the
most incredible leader and efficient captain. He is smooth, almost
professional in his attention to all the details of running a team. Please, if
anyone reading this knows of a team that might be able to come, get them in
touch with me. I really would like to set this up as an annual event of some
sort, and have a kind of junior NATwA.
Starting the team at school was very hard, by the way. The younger the kids, the more so. For one thing, as the kids are younger, more and more work ends up in the coach's hands. Another problem I found was getting some other teachers involved. The suburban lifestyle really precludes anything as eccentric as winks. When I had some of them interested, it was still impossible to get them to consider having practices some evenings or weekends. It just didn't mix with cocktails and ski weekends and visiting the in-laws. So we met just one hour a week, like all the other "extracurricular" clubs, so of course they were pretty lousy players.
One last comment. All these difficulties and efforts to get a team going, among the faculty, then among the kids, and now most recently at the high school, where I taught for a week and set up the team about 2 weeks ago, have made me definitely agree with those who want to change the name of the game. It is just such a useless handicap, and with all the other flak I've had to manage, this was just too much. Also, with college kids there's a certain amount of curiosity and openness so that the derision has a chance of being changed once they see the game. But at the middle school, and the high school, the name was enough to gain the everlasting scorn and ridicule of 95% of the kids, reinforced by a general atmosphere of putting things down that does exist in the schools, and especially by a great fear of appearing childish.
At the Congress I will reintroduce a resolution to change the name of the game. Winks, or even some randomly selected name would be acceptable. Anything is preferable to spending half your time explaining what the game is not, just so some characters can feel cool and superior because they know what the game is really like and how false the impression of the general public is.
Lake Mohegan, N.Y.
I think I'm still alive, but for purposes of winking I'm in a state of suspended animation. It seems doubtful that I'll get to the continentals, although there is a slight chance. I've had very little time for winking since I've been working 36 hours a week, taking two grad courses in EE each term and getting engaged to the most wonderful girl in the world.
I`d really hate to miss the continentals for the first time after all these years, but I think I'll have to. Hello to all.
Silver Spring, Md.
(sorry about the typing folks but I've been at it for 10 straight hours now and think that I've just about had it.)
Apparently, some members of the MIT team recently saw "The St. Valentine's
Day Massacre." After losing to a dedicated HYTH team they attempted to
eliminate one half of the championship team. As is the MIT way, they lost.
And why did they lose? It wasn't even St. Valentine's Day, that's why. The
facts are that they hired an assassin who drove his car into the car in which
Carl, Sunshine and myself were traveling. Although their insidious plot
failed, Carl, our devoted team leader, will be unable to attend the
continentals. The other two dedicated HYTH players escaped with head injuries
which will only slow the overwhelming thinking edge that the dedicated HYTH
team has. My proof of this plot is that the other player borrowed 55 c from me
to, (and I quote), "call some Rinky Dinky guy in Boston and get my $403.99."
In accordance with this charge and with the fact that the dedicated HYTH team is the only sexually equal opportunity winks team in NATwA, I think that the HYTHNLBTWOC as a whole be given the Yvonne F. Lukey Memorial Award.
Bill "Red Scarf" Gammerdinger
I agree that we should try to maintain better communication between the winking powers on each side of the Atlantic than has been the case in the past. It is, as you say, more difficult between people who have never met, and cannot foresee doing so in the near future. An ETwA vs. NATwA match would obviously help in this respect, as well as being tremendous publicity. However, my efforts, as well as yours, to find a willing sponsor have been fruitless. I will keep trying, though, and let you know if and when any progress is made.
You invited me to submit an article for publication in NEWSWINK; I am working on a rather long discussion of the tactics and strategies of tiddlywinks, something about which amazingly little has been published so far.
At the moment (and in the foreseeable future) my work, studies related to my work, and a complication of various other matters demand about 150% of my time. That is, I can't seem to find enough time to do all these things that take priority over my favorite pastime.
As a result, I feel it would be highly unfair of me to produce any further NEWSWINKs in the hope that I might find the required time, or to take on any other responsibilities of any kind. I feel the editorship of NEWSWINK should be passed on to someone else who can do the paper justice although I am sure that in the future I shall be submitting an occasional article for approval to the new editor.
The 1972 Western Regionals (since renamed the Ithaca Open) were held at
Cornell Univ. the weekend of Nov. 13-14. Due to circumstances beyond God knows
whose control, only two western teams (Toronto and host Cornell) were present to qualify for the continentals. However, a band of renegade easterners, traveling under the name of the Masked Marauders, appeared to do battle with the best of the west and emerged victoriously victorious.
MASKED MARAUDERS CORNELL TORONTO
M1 Jake, Dean, MP C1 Dave-Severin, Bozo T1 Byron-Mel
M2 *, Mary, MP, Bozo, Pete C2 Fred-Bob T2 Lindsey-Wendy
M3 Bill-Jim C3 Bob-Sid, Steve T3 Roger-Steve
Masked Marauders 77 1/3
Cornell 68 1/6
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --
C1 M2 M3 C2 M1 T1 T2 C3 T3
31 1/6 30 27 25 20 1/3 18 15 12 10½
Congrats to Dave and Severin for being tops
MASKED MARAUDERS (37 5/6)
CORNELL (25 1/6)
C1 C2 C3
M1 2 1/3-4 2/3 2-5 6-1 10 1/3
M2 4½-2½ 5-2 6-1 15½
M3 1-6 7-0 4-3 12
13 1/6 7 5
MASKED MARAUDERS (39½)
T1 T2 T3
M1 0-7 4-3 6-1 10
M2 5-2 6-1 3½-3½ 14½
M3 6-1 4-3 6-1 15
10 8 5½
T1 T2 T3
C1 5-2 7-0 6-1 18
C2 5-2 6-1 7-0 18
C3 3-4 1-6 3-4 7
8 7 5
* denotes forfeit or Sunshine as the case may be
The 1972 Eastern Regionals were held at MIT the weekend of Dec. 4-5, 1971
amid throngs of screaming yellow zonkers. After the long and grueling six team
round robin the dedicated forces of HYTHNLBTWOC edged MIT 'A' by the narrow score of 211 to 206½.
Special recognition goes to Tim and J. Christ for being top pair with a 13-2 record and 79 points. Rookie of the match was Bonnie Freeman of Somerville
who, in her first match averaged better than 5 points per game.
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18
MA1 S2 HA1 HA2 S1 HA3 MA3 MA2 HB1 S3 MB3 MB1 HB2 Mc2 MB2 HB3 Mc1 Mc3
2 5 1 1
79 76½ 74 70 68 67 65½ 62 50- 45½ 44½ 43- 39- 37 35½ 34½ 27- 25
3 6 3 6
1. HYTHNLBTWOC 'A' 211 4. HYTHNLBTWOC 'B' 124½
2. MIT 'A' 206½ 5. MIT 'B' 123 5/6
3. SOMERVILLE 190 6. McGILL 89 1/6
\HYTHNLBTWOC 'A'\ (211)
\MIT 'A'\ (206½)
MA1 Tim-J. Christ
MA2 Bill-Mitch, Jim
MA3 Moishe, Dan, Pete
S2 Bob-Bonnie, Dan
S3 Mex-Gred, Bonnie
\HYTHNLBTWOC 'B'\ (124½)
HB2 Beast-L, Allan, Mike
HB3 Mike-Allan or Ronnie-Scott
\MIT 'B'\ (123 5/6)
MB2 Sue-Todd, Dave, Scott, Ruby
MB3 Craig, Ruby, Dave, Jay, Larry, Ross
\McGILL\ (89 1/6)
HYTH 'A' (34)
MIT 'A' (29)
MA1 MA2 MA3
HA1 1½-5½ 6-1 1½-5½ 9
HA2 1-6 5-2 7-0 13
HA3 4-3 3-4 5-2 12
14½ 7 7½
MIT 'B' (43)
Mc1 Mc2 Mc3
MB1 4-3 5-2 5½-1½ 14½
MB2 5-2 3-4 5½-1½ 13½
MB3 6-1 3-4 6-1 15
6 14 4
HYTH 'B' (35 2/3)
MIT 'B' (27 1/3)
MB1 MB2 MB3
HB1 4 2/3-2 1/3 5-2 6-1 15 2/3
HB2 3½-3½ 3-4 4½-2½ 11
HB3 1-6 5-2 3-4 9
11 5/6 8 7½
HYTH 'A' (32½)
S1 S2 S3
HA1 6-1 1-6 5-2 12
HA2 1-6 5-2 6-1 12
HA3 4½-2½ 1-6 3-4 8½
9½ 14 7
MIT 'A' (48)
S1 S2 S3
MA1 1-6 6-1 1-6 13
MA2 1-6 2-5 6-1 9
MA3 4-3 4-3 6-1 14
15 9 3
HYTH 'B' (33 1/3)
McGILL (29 2/3)
Mc1 Mc2 Mc3
HB1 3-4 3-4 6-1 12
HB2 2 1/3-4 2/3 1-6 6-1 9 1/3
HB3 5½-1½ 1-6 5½-1½ 12
10 1/6 16 3 1/2
HYTH 'A' (45½)
HYTH 'B' (17½)
HB1 HB2 HB3
HA1 6-1 6-1 6-1 18
HA2 2½-4½ 6-1 6-1 14½
HA3 1-6 6-1 6-1 13
11½ 3 3
MIT 'A' (48)
HYTH 'B' (15)
HB1 HB2 HB3
MA1 6-1 6-1 7-0 19
MA2 5-2 6-1 5-2 16
MA3 6-1 1-6 6-1 13
4 8 3
HYTH 'B' (23)
HB1 HB2 HB3
S1 6-1 6-1 2-5 14
S2 6-1 6-1 6-1 18
S3 1½-5½ 1-6 5½-1½ 8
7½ 8 7½
HYTH 'A' (48)
MIT 'B' (15)
MB1 MB2 MB3
HA1 6-1 6-1 6-1 18
HA2 6-1 6-1 1-6 13
HA3 5-2 6-1 6-1 17
4 3 8
MIT 'A' (41½)
MIT 'B' (21½)
MB1 MB2 MB3
MA1 6-1 6-1 4½-2½ 16½
MA2 5½-1½ 1-6 5½-1½ 12
MA3 1-6 6-1 6-1 13
8½ 8 5
MIT 'B' (17)
MB1 MB2 MB3
S1 5½-1½ 6-1 3-4 14½
S2 5½-1½ 6-1 6-1 17½
S3 5-2 6-1 3-4 14
5 3 9
HYTH 'A' (51)
Mc1 Mc2 Mc3
HA1 5-2 6-1 6-1 17
HA2 6-1 5½-1½ 6-1 17½
HA3 6-1 4½-2½ 6-1 16½
4 5 3
MIT 'A' (52)
Mc1 Mc2 Mc3
MA1 6-1 6-1 4-3 16
MA2 6-1 6-1 6-1 18
MA3 6-1 6-1 6-1 18
3 3 5
Mc1 Mc2 Mc3
S1 6-1 3-4 6-1 15
S2 6-1 6-1 6-1 18
S3 5-2 6-1 2½-4½ 13½
4 6 6½
Severin`s Fall Lake Mohegan weekend started on a sour note last October,
when only 7 of the originally expected 14 winkers showed up. The weekend was
to be one of the big events of the year, with seven major teams each sending
two people but by the time Friday evening had arrived only Sunshine and Mary
(HYTH), Bill Renke and Jim Marlin (MIT), Ferd (Somerville) and host Severin had
appeared at the small home on the shores of Lake Mohegan.
The weekend was spent winking, waiting for Andy, winking, eating pizza, winking, waiting for Andy, winking, playing tennis baseball, more winking, more waiting for Andy, still more winking, waiting for Phil, even more winking, giving up on waiting for Andy and a lot of hitching. What more can be said?
Severin's Winter Perversion weekend at Lake Mohegan drew crowds from all over North America, braking [sic] attendance records for perversion weekends in Lake Mohegan. In all, Sunshine, Bill Renke, and Pete Copper all competed with Severin for the title of pervert of the weekend which was eventually won by Fred Astaire, who put in a surprise visit Saturday evening. A fine time was had by all.
As you all know, the 1972 continentals are but a few short weeks away. On
Saturday evening, the 19th, the annual NATwA congress will convene, at which
time many problems and proposals within the organisation will be discussed and
voted upon. Hopefully, the friendly atmosphere of past congresses will
prevail. This is an opportunity for the little known winkers to express their
opinions to the whole of NATwA without feeling inferior or neglected.
The following are a couple of topics I wish to have discussed at the congress. Please read them over and discuss them among fellow winkers so that the congress this year may result in a more meaningful collection of opinions.
At last year[']s congress, a rules committee was appointed to help resolve all questionable situations that occur in some games. Many new questions have since arisen relating to a set of standardized rules to be used here and in England. They are:
The subject of players jumping from team to team has been brought up at
various times over the past few years, but little has been decided. Should
NATwA set some general standards on team eligibility, or should the present "laissez faire" attitude continue?
Please discuss these topics among other winkers and be prepared to rap about them. Thanks. See you in Ithaca.
Bill Renke (Ground Hogs' Day, 1972)
In December '68 Richard Pieper, a Cornell student and Haverford High
graduate, happened to stumble upon the '68 continentals, which by coincidence
were being held at Cornell. Intrigued by the game, he went to the local downtown Ithaca Woolworths and bought himself a set of Milton Bradley Jumbo
Tiddlywinks. A few weeks later, during Christmas vacation, he managed to get Ron and Mike Brachman interested back in beautiful downtwon Havertown. He
couldn't remember all the rules, so the three of them sort of improvised and developed a game more dependent upon potting. When Mike Brachman returned to
school in January, he began to play in the cafeteria. Despite an initial negative reaction by the uninitiated masses climaxing in fruit wars between
tables, an underground movement flourished under the leadership of Mike. By the spring, the whole school had turned on to potting and the first annual R.
D. Pieper Memorial Spring Tiddlywinks Tournament of Champions was held with 32 players entered in the single elimination tourney.
The following school year Mike succeeded in making tiddlywinks an even bigger and better activity at the school. The school's radio station carried
the finals of the second annual R. D. Pieper (etc.) and this time 64 students were involved in the event.
Last fall, Mike entered Michigan University and left HHSTw in the hands of Sue Shrut, a senior. But unfortunately the craze had begun to die. Student
apathy set in and the future of Haverford winks is unknown. By some strange pregression of letters, Mike learned of the existence of NATwA, and before long
Haverford had received an unreadable letter from Sunshine and an unexpected visit from Tim Schiller.
What has happened to Haverford winkers? Mike promises to get in contact with Stan Perlo (remember him?) at M. U. and may start a team there. Sue Shrut
has become an MIT coed, a very rare creature indeed, and the half dozen or so other known winkers are scattered all across the northeast and may be starting
or joining other teams.
Broadcasting history was made on the morning (very early in the morning) of Saturday April 29th 1971, when the B.B.C. Radio 4 programme "Today" put out live the first ever Intercontinental Winks match, between the English Champion, Alan Dean, and Rosie Wain of Canada. There is no Singles championship of Canada but Rosie and her partner Andy Tomaszewski are the pairs titleholders.
As one of the only two spectators to the final of the first English Singles
Championship, it is perhaps appropriate that I shoul report on the latest of
A.D.'s encounters again played under somewhat unusual conditions (the Singles
final had of course been played in the entrance hall of the UMIST Union
The match took place in a small studio in the depths of Broadcasting House with an audience consisting of Mick Still the (impartial?) umpire, one completely baffled commentator, and myself (and about seven million listeners). Fortunately the Canadian version of the game is very much the same as ours, though across the Atlantic 25 minutes rather tahn 20 is the accepted time limit. The players were also in agreement on the blue - green - red - yellow colour order (unlike some people). One "killer" game had to decide the contest in order to fit with the programme schedule.
Rosie started well, getting some good squops, and was also assisted by Alan sending one of his winks off the table, but she was soon suffering and Alan had gained control by the half-way stage. Several times during the game the reporter, Dennis Frost, discussed the state of play over the air with Mick Still, who explained that the object of the game was not just to pot the winks (nor even to flick the counters into the egg-cup).
Alan duly went on to win the game 6-1 (the score was never reported on the radio) and the two players then faced an interview with Michael Aspel. He was sure it was unfair to have a match of a man against a woman, though as Rosie observed, "Sex doesn't matter!".
Everyone at the B.B.C. was most friendly and kind and we were very grateful for the chance to see the /w/akings of the corporation from the inside, and for the opportunity to give Winks some nationwide publicity. Let's hope this is the start of a new upsurge of interest in the game.
(Winking World - 19 July '71)
Rosie Wain was named first Lady of Winks by the North American Tiddlywinks
Association at the Pairs Tournament this May, on the occasion of her retirement
from active winking. Her ten-year career, during which she served dedicatedly as both player and administrator in three different countries (English, the U.S. and Canada), was crowned with the Canadian Pairs Championship in both 1970 and 1971, and the Co-Secretary-Generalship of NATwA in her final year. A can be seen from the article above, from the fact that she still presides over Winks demonstrations to novices, and from her willingness to serve as the NATwA ambassador to ETwA, it is evident that Rosie has not completely severed ties with the game to which she has already given so much. It is for all these things, as well as the enthusiasm and personality that endeared her to everyone, that she has been nominated by popular acclaim to be the first member of the NATwA Closet of Fame.
SInce the May tournament, Rosie ahs returned to England to stay. She has
enrolled at a teachers college in Nottingham and reports that she enjoys
teaching Chemistry and Physics to 11 year-olds each week at Humphrey Perkins Secondary School in the village of Barrow-upon-Soar. Rosie also mentions that
the autumn in England is "boringly brown"; to compensate, she purchased a bright orange mini which she considered naming after her former idol, Moishe
(Moishe the mini???). The former Moishe eventually lost out, however, to CAROTENMOBILE.
P.S.: Dear Rosie.....Who was that "wishy-washy little tit"?
WINKING WORLD (Reprinted without permission)
The exciting possibility of a match being arranged in England this year between teams representing NATwA and ETwA makes front-page news in this issue of Winking World. Publicity and public relations director of NATwA is Bryon Alexandroff, who is in addition captain of the Toronto club. According to Bryon, the NATwA team would probably come to England in late of mid-1971, and would generate world-wide publicity from its side of the Atlantic, as indeed would ETwA. Bryon mentions, perhaps ominously, that they (NATwA) have not yet acquired the financial support for such a trip but they are nevertheless keen to know whether the possibility for a World Championship match exists.
Whether or not this does in fact take place in 1971, it seems that, in the view of the healthy state of the game both in Britain and across the Atlantic, it cannot be long before winking armies from North America/n/ and England come together to do battle. And although I feel there is no danger of anyone over here underestimating anyone over there, it is perhaps appropriate to contemplate another sport that England gave the world, and remember what befell her against the United States in the 1950 World Cup football tournament. (Answer - p.94) There again, if England were to lose the Bombay Bowl at the Congress next April, thereby losing the home international championship, awkward que[s]tions might be raised as to who was qualified to compete for what.
(Winking World - 18 Jan. '71)
This year[']s Congress bore the Alan Dean trademark of 'less talk and more winks'[,] a good thing but it meant that little thought was given to the stagnating state of winks in this country and the fact that the last ten years have seen no increase in the number of schools and youth clubs playing the game.
The mass media were there in force and so, one would think, this was a tremendous opportunity to fire the imaginations of the many millions of potential winkers who don't know it yet. In fact, most of the national dailies carried only a small paragraph about the event and no-one listens to Radio Manchester anyway.
One reason for this could be the much lamented passing of the mini-skirt. Rear views of young ladies bending over tables to take their shots always used to guarantee a fai amount ofexposure - in every sense of the word!The main reason, though, must surely be that we are all incredibly ordinary, boring, common or garden people. We aren't idiots. We aren't mad. No, Rev. Shepherd, it's no good trying to inject the game with something of the respectable gentility of the boatrace; after all - how many winkers started playing, thinking it was a serious game? Changing the name isn't the answer either.
Last year's Congress decided that the only better alternative names in order to attract more people to the game were 'Sex' and 'Football', both of which, if implemented, presented certain problems. For instance, the 'International Rules of Sex' would almost certainly be banned and quite what the 'Prince Philip Silver _____' trophy would be is anybody's guess!
No winkers, we're presenting the wrong image. We must be mad. We must be idiots. Winks is a silly game anyway. Let's start treating it as such - at least whilst we're under the glare of publicity.
The public already laugh at the game and trying to tell them they're wrong to do so is like running up an escalator which is going down. So let's change directionand then, maybe, more people will start taking to the mats, because only if they come to realise for themselves what a great game Winks can be, does the winking population of the country stand any chance of increasing.
(Winking World - 19 July '71)
The first annual Branches of the Tree Tournament was held in April at Nestor Stadium, Teaneck N.J. The 3 branches of the HYTH (Hark Yon Tree Hath No Leaves But They Will Out Club) - Boston, Teaneck and Philadelphia each supplied four bodies. The turning point of the match occur[r]ed in the 0th round when branch leaders from Philly and Boston met and held a trade. Philly sent Shana Bricklin to Boston and in return received Allan Fuchs, a chunk of salami, and Boston's 2nd round draft pick for the 1972 season. With classical music as clocks, the action proceeded, and le/a/d by unde[fe]ated Shana and L, Boston proved to be the team most successful at accumulating points, narrowly defeating Teaneck. After the match, Philly and Boston conducted a trade.
Boston sent Shana to Philly and receive in return Allan, its very own 1972 draft pick aod the remains of a chunk of salami. The reduction of the chunk was attributed to depreciation of Shana.
The first annual Boston Invitational Tourney was held at MIT on the weekend
of April 25th. MIT challenged the combined strengths of Somerville and
HYTHNLbtwoc in what proved to be a one-sided match.
|Bob Jon||***** Mary||Ferd L||Gred Sue||BillG Dean||Carl Nestor||TOTAL|
When 48 winkers gather together on the day before Halloween to play winks, what more can be said?
P.S. Severin wanted me to tell everyone that he played the worst game of his entire life against Moishe in this match. Consider it told.
I am a poor, small, very flat red wink who can't seem to find anyone to squop with. No one in Flatland seems to understand what squopping is. Recently I met a big handsome blue squidger from Sphereland who has helped me overcome my problem, but I just can't get squopped enough. He told me that what I really need to do is put on some weight and go to an orgy, where lots and lots of winks get squopped, but I seem unable to put on the necessary weight or even find out when the next tiddlywinks orgy will take place. He told me that you may be able to help. Please help! I am desp[e]rate.
P.S. Why don't you come up and quop me sometime? You won't be sorry.
I just may do that.
In a game recently, I exploded a very large pile which resulted in all twelve of our opponents['] winks squopping each other, and leaving all 12 of our winks free. Since our opponents were squopped out we received 12 free turns. But how can we free them if we are not squopping them? Must we waste a free turn squopping them so we can free them or do we just move one of their winks aside after the turns are over or what?
Son of Captain Nemo
Help! All my friends think I'm crazy when I tell them I scored 12⅙ points in two games last week. I was playing with A. C. Dent against Joe Hill and Wobbley last Tuesday, when in the first game A. C. potted out and Wobbley and I each had one wink left to pot. It was my turn and when I shot my wink it hit Wobbley's and both bounced into the pot. Now A. C. got 4 pts. for first and the two-way tie for second got us another 1½ pts. Adding in the 1 pt. transfer gave us a 6½ - ½ pt. victory. In the second game A. C., Joe, and I each potted 5 winks with our last ones involved in a pile with me on top. I managed to pot all 3 of our winks in the same turn, thus ending the game. Since the three of us tied for first A. C. and I received 4 2/3 pts. plus the 1 pt. transfer for a 5 2/3 - 1 1/3 pt. victory. Do you believe me? A. C., Joe and Wobbley refuse to comment on the games and they're tryin[g] to convince me it was all a bad dream, but I know it really happened.
Why don't you pair up with Captain Nemo's son. You'd be deadly.
Cambridge (BR) -- On Saturday, September 24, 1971 at 10:30 PM Tim Schiller, MITwA [sic] Captain accomplished the impossible. Playing a four-color game against Bill Renke, he was in the process of blitzing his opponent when after having potted two winks, missed his third, landing it within half a wink of enemy blue. Engrossed with rage, he hurled his famous red squidger at the nearest brick wall and watched in disbelief as it proceeded to shatter into a half-dozen pieces. Weakened by the occur[r]ence, he completed the game under great distress and fell to his sympathetic opponent by the score of 5½ - 1½.
Asked after the game if he had a few words for the press, he stated, "#6XPfT#%! Do you realize I've had that grainy red squidger for four years now? I've thrown it hundreds of times and not once has it even chipped. I guess I'm going to have to find myself another squidger."
But the question remains: Will Tim call his new squidger Andy?
"Andy", being Ferd's truck and having caused him great distress by refusing to run has been adopted by the Bobs. As Rosie called her former Volkswagon [sic] "Bob", we are hoping they will consider calling the truck "Rosie". Mea[n]while, Andy's "Ferd de Ford" probably has less than a year to live, and he is hoping within that time to befriend a deep-purple Volkswagon [sic] which he will call "Purple Floynk", after Pink Floyd. He says, "It's going to be an Atom-Hearted Mother with a four-speed Ummagumma!!... but they all become Relics in the end." As do we all.
The annual A. C. DENT Memorial Award this year goes to Sunshine, Bill Gammerdinger, and Carl Chenkin for their great perform[a]nce on the evening of Dec. 5th. While driving through Hackensack, N.J. they managed to get squopped from behind[,] forced into the guard rail and without the least bit of strain, Bill and Carl managed to violently squidge themselves a total of some 72 feet from the car. As expected, Sunshine slept through the entire event.
The YVONNE F. LUKEY OF THE YEAR Award goes to Andy Tomaszewski for craftily being lost for the last nine months, during which time he missed two tournaments he promised to attend and postponed the publication of this issue at least three times. We, the forgetful people of the world, salute you Andy!
The Suzy Homemaker Winkbread of the Year Award will be presented by last year[']s winner, iced-unsliced raisin bread at the continentals in Ithaca next month. For those of you interested in baking a loaf.....
Mix well in above. Bake 1½ hours at 350 degrees or until done.
Makes two loaves.
(For those of you who don't know what you're making, some call it Pumpkin Bread.)
Since the Cornell-MIT-Harvard triangular match of February '67, 19 matches
consisting of 1124 tournament games have been played in North America. The
people responsible for producing the following collection of useless facts are Severin, Sunshine, and Bill Renke. Do unto them whatever you wish, but
remember, an IBM 360 is watching you.
1 Ferd 103
2 Bob 100
3 ***** 89
4 Severin 66
1 Ferd 643 1/6
2 Bob 632
3 ***** 548 1/6
4 Severin 425 1/6
1 Phil 5.08
2 Ferd 5.07
3 Bob 5.02
4 Tim 4.81
An interesting statistic first noticed at the BIT last April, implies that a team's scoring performance is inversely proportional to the amount of sleep it received the night before. HYTHBYTE scored 61% of the points, but only got 36% of the sleep. At the HOTT in October similar relationships were also observed (See next issue for fun-packed formulars [sic]).
|2 in.||996 / 1000||99.6%|
|4 in.||497 / 500||99.4|
|7½ in.||946 / 1000||90.2|
|9 in.||451 / 500||85.0|
|12 in.||425 / 500||63.2|
|15 in.||45 / 100||45.0|
Most consecutive winks potted - 332 (2")
Most consecutive squidgers potted individual - Bill Renke - 50
Longest gromp - Bill Gammerdinger and Carl Chenkin - 72 feet
Longest winning streak individual - Tim Schiller - 24 games
pair - Jeff and Sunshine - 20 games
Dean Solomon and Bill Gammerdinger vs. Bill Renke and Jim Marlin - 93 min.
An original poem(?) by Andy Tomaszewski
Blue and green and red and yellow,
Each is a congenial fellow;
Green and red and yellow and blue,
They are all companions true;
Red and yellow and blue and green,
They're always nice and never mean;
Yellow and blue and green and red,
Love and friendship here are bred;
Blue and green and red and .....
SQUOPPED ! ! !
You son of a bitch.
the question, to wit, namely...."What I like most about Tiddlywinks" (in twenty-five minutes or less)
The list of responses:
The men and women who were on the street at the time the question was asked, and who answered decently include:
Instructions to the general populace:
Match the names in the human being column (above, not intended to be exclusive or inclusive) to the quotations in the column on the left [above], as
best you can. Score yourself as follows:
What to do with a little space left over...I dunno
Ottawa, May 2-3, 1971
|1||Ferd T. Bull-Bob Henninge||-||6||6||6||6||6||5||7||7||7||6||62|
|2||Severin Drix-Phil Villar||1||-||6||6||5½||4||5||6||6||5||6||50½|
|3||Rosie Wain-Andy Tomaszewski||1||1||-||6||6||6||6||6||3||6||6||47|
|4||Lee Cousins-Dave Barbano||1||1||1||-||4½||4½||2½||6||3||6||7||36½|
|7||Bryon Alexandroff-Jolyon Bon||2||2||1||4½||1||6||-||1½||6||2||4||30|
|8||Debbie Tennenbaum-Marty Vine||0||1||1||1||1||2||5½||-||5||6||6||28½|
|9||Barry Corbin-Glen Kezwer||0||1||4||4||1||1½||1||2||-||5||7||26½|
|10||Wendy and Lindsey Horenblas||0||2||1||1||5||1||5||1||2||-||6||24|
|11||Chris Howard-Tom Berge||1||1||1||0||1||1||3||1||0||1||-||10|
JAWBONE AND CONTEST
Dateline: Johnson City, Tennessee Jan. 31, '72
Flash! NATwA Goes To War!
Members of the NATwA Barnstorming Expeditionary Force went to War, West
Virginia early in their 1972 Southern Campaign. Attempting a blitz on the
steps of the War State Liquor Store, they were almost squopped out by a formidable state police pair, currently playing for the Warriors. A serious
auto-squ[o]p notwithstanding, our heroes managed to rip off a respect[a]ble 2 points, and realized that a modification of their Southern strategy was
necessary for further success. Marriage ensued.
Perversions flourished in 1971. Besides squop game variations like "tennis", sadistic games like Squidger and Bite have been experimented with.
Rules have been developed for basketball, soccer, hockey, tubbing, capture the flag, idiot's delight, baseball, and boxing among others.
Sometime this spring, a perversion magazine by the name of _____ will be
published and sent to all interested parties. It will contain rules to many of
the perversions and all sorts of other random information as well.
Send your name for the new Perversion mag to
424 S. 43 St.
Philadelphia, Pa. 19104
Naomi missed her most crucial play of the Pairs Tourney last May when she blew a simple two foot squop. The parking lot squop, if successful, would have eliminated Andy's "Ferd de Ford" and 5/6 of the eventual 3 top pairs of the match. Huh?
Sunshine says, "Mary is the best natural squopper I've ever met!"
Jude has been made official HYTHNLBTWOC wizard by acclamation. His wizard hands and expert coaching led HYTH to victory in the Eastern Regionals.
Shana, NATwA Grand Froebel, has publicly expressed her desire to go to the continentals.
Daniel Dern, Official NATwA photographer, will be present during the
continentals taking pictures and generally making his presence unknown. Any of
you interested in purchasing copies at a small fee should contact him.
THIS SPACE AVAILABLE FOR RENT
One editor last seen in Ottawa on May 2, 1971. If found, please send to continentals. Big reward.
One Harpur winker in Buffalo.
One large Oxford blue wink last seen at the HOTT. Contact Mike Krassner [sic] at ALF.
One Secretary-General last seen in Ithaca, NY on Nov. 21, 1971. Rumored to be in Barbados. If found, please send to continentals. Reward.
One entire team last seen at 1971 continentals. Rumored to have gone underground. If found, contact Bill Renke. Reward only if complete.
One large blue wink of the old type. If yours, contact Moishe.
One ex-Secretary-General at Eastern Regionals. Slightly aged. Owner please claim within 30 days or will have to retire.
April 29th+30th [Note by Severin: May 6-7]
March 18 [Note by Severin: March 25]
BIT [Note by Severin: Apr 22-23 (prob.)]
Boston Invitational Tournament
HIBYOTT [Note by Severin: May (2nd/3rd wkend)]
HYTH Invitational Bring Your Own Table Tourney
HUT [Note by Severin: crossed out section]
HYTH Uninvited Tourney
HYTH members only
SPRING LAKE MOHEGAN WKD.
Bryon Alexandroff and Lani Nathanson
Lindsey Horenblas and Wendy Levinson
Jeff Wieselthier and non-winker
Rosie Wain, former editor of NEWSWINK and Secretary-General of NATwA passed away last May in Ottawa, Ontario. Miss Wain was noteworthy for her great expertise on the mat. Her loss is indeed a great sorrow. Flowers and words of encouragement may be sent to
14 South Rd.
Clure (Nov 1968 - Dec 1971)
Best known for her defensive work, she was by far the hardest to squop. Her
strategical plays often forced her green teammates['] opposition into
nonoptional shots in vi/s/cious attempts to [do] her in. Retained amateur status, playing only in the BOT. She is survived by none, mourned by many.
Carl Chenkin, former HYTH star and North American Squidger champion passed
away on the evening of Dec. 5, 1971; the victim of an automobile accident.
Fortunately, the death is only temporary and he should resu[rr]ect sometime in June. All letters of condolences should be sent to
103 E. Tryon Ave.